Gunman in Pittsburgh gym massacre, George Sodini, planned shooting for months, his journal reveals

(e3media)--They are the musings of a monster.

The frustrated loner who murdered three women at a suburban Pittsburgh gym before killing himself wrote a vile journal that revealed he planned the massacre for months - and "chickened out" on his first try.

Suicidal suspect George Sodini complained he'd had "no sex since July 1990" and blamed his parents, his siblings - even his preacher - for the fact that "girls and women don't even give me a second look ANYWHERE."

He placed a date of death - Aug. 4 - atop his Web site. He made it clear he didn't care who read his words.

"I will not be embarased [sic], because, well, I will be dead," he wrote in his final entry Friday. "Death lives!"

On Tuesday, Sodini strolled into an LA Fitness gym with four guns in a duffle bag and headed for a room where an aerobics class was underway.

Sodini pulled out two guns, both bought legally. Then he flipped off the lights and started shooting, police said.

Cops said he fired 35 times before turning a .45-caliber revolver on himself.

When it was over, three women were dead, nine others were injured and yet another disturbed gunman had etched his name in blood in the annals of American crime.

"He had no relationship with anyone at the club that we know of," local police Superintendent Charles Moffatt said. "He was hell bent on doing what he did."

Sodini's words confirm that. "Why do this? To young girls?" began his 4,610-word journal. "Just read below."

Sodini's first entry on Nov. 5, 2008, was a racist rant about President Obama and black men. The seeds of slaughter were sown in subsequent entries, where he complained about not having had a girlfriend "since 1984."

"Who knows why," he wrote. "I am not too ugly or too weird."

Sodini dismissed his dad as a "useless sperm donor." He raged against his "useless bully" brother. He called his mother "The Central Boss." He blasted his former pastor.

"This guy teaches (and convinced me) you can commit mass murder then still go to heaven," Sodini wrote.

A software developer for a Pittsburgh law firm, Sodini also ripped a colleague, writing that the "worst people by far are the religious types."

Sodini first tried to commit mass murder at the gym on Jan. 6 but lost his nerve. He wrote about trying to calm himself by drinking or getting high.

"I just need to use common sense, can't drink and drive etc.," he wrote.

Then, on May 18, Sodini wrote that he "actually had a date today" with a woman he met on the bus. And yet, in the same entry, Sodini wrote he was "TOTALLY ALONE."

In his final hours, Sodini added to his site the name of a woman who "had my baby in early 1991." She appears to have died five years ago.

Addressing his readers, Sodini concluded, "Maybe all this will shed insight on why some people just cannot make things happen in their life."